Marking the moment

I’ve just posted my last ever Purlescence orders, and closed the shop for handover.

You’d think it would be bittersweet; but honestly, it’s just a happy thing. I decided so long ago that I needed to sell, I’ve had plenty of time to feel sad… and then terrified, and neurotic, and exposed, and then (surprisingly) painfully aware of all my business failings… but finally, when I made an actual deal, all of a sudden I just felt great. I was (am) so happy with the buyer, so sure they’re going to do justice to what I started and even take it further; maybe more like what I hoped it could become, maybe something entirely new, but all good, and all in the Purlescence spirit. So I’m extremely happy with the deal I made. And getting that deal made me feel, suddenly, like a real businessperson. I know, I know; you  might imagine I’d taken that idea on board some years previously. But no. I always felt like I was faking it; just a hobby, and all. But now, it’s not just a little knitting thing I did on the side. It’s something I started, and sold, and it’s out there in the world with a life of its own. It’s also something that someone else, and her partner, and her bank manager, all see enough value in to make a serious financial commitment. Which feels great. Ah, tasty tasty validation.

Also feeling great? Looking forward to life without the constant burden of all those Things To Do. Not that I’m entirely a lady of leisure, of course (no mother is, unless perhaps they should have an army of staff, and plus there’s occasional editing work), but for the first time… well, ever, I find myself without a big Project to work on. Somehow, I’ve always had that. Even while I was a regular full-time worker, I always had something on the side: first a degree, then a few big (book-length) editing projects, then Purlescence… I pretty much never had any “spare time” to enjoy without knowing I was skiving off on something or other. Now, to be living in the day to day? It’s an astonishing thing. I doubt very much that Claudia will allow me much of this mythical “spare time” I hear people speak so highly of, but if it should arise, it will be truly mine to savour. What a very delicious idea.