All good things: 5 things 5.2.18

• Every time I think about it, I’m overwhelmed with just how lucky we were with our Swiss move. Armin got a job basically the minute he started looking. The long-distance flat hunt was challenging, but his father helped, and was able to recommend the flat we eventually picked. The fact we were in a position to pick at all is also pretty darn lucky – it’s not at all a given, here, that you can rent the flat you like. You have to apply. It’s very competitive. So that was lucky! And, wow, did we land in the right place. This flat is old and smallish, and I don’t want to live here forever, but it’s also really cheap (so we’re saving a lot) and as far as location goes… We had no way of knowing just how perfect the location would turn out. I mean it’s a nice village. It’s a convenient spot. But it’s the neighbours we’re so very lucky with. Especially the two moms within metres of us who each have two kids, of the same ages as our kids, and the whole lot of them get on extremely well. And we mothers – our attitudes and working situations are such that we’re able to support each other very closely with childcare and playdates and so on. And one of them is a real friend. This is not something I could ever take for granted: the unbelievable magic of having an easy support system right there. It’s amazing and wonderful. Such luck.
• I’m feeling weirdly proud of my daughter, who is generally everyone’s friend, over a clash with a Mean Kid. Partly because I have decided this clash is evidence that C is not letting herself be walked all over. Also, with far more basis in fact, I’m proud that C is noticing the things Mean Kid does that aren’t mean. She’s consciously absorbing and reflecting on the idea that people aren’t all bad or all good. This is excellent.
• In my ongoing, interminable ruminations over motherhood and its difficulties, I’ve decided the big big BIG difference between the early and later stages – when, parents of older kids love to point out, bigger kids mean bigger problems – isn’t that you have enough sleep to deal with those problems. It’s that you have enough personhood. Parenting babies and toddlers felt like I was completely ripped to shreds and there was no me left; I existed only to serve their needs. So yeah, no doubt teenagers can generate truly enormously scary worries, but it’s still the difference between being a person dealing with a problem, and… not being a person at all. (Yup, I’m still really enjoying being a person again. The novelty has not worn off. And yup, I realise this paragraph is going to get waved in my face 8-10 years from now with much Schadengiggles.)
• Actually the kids are going through a rather lovely phase right now; have we finally reached the easy bit? Max seems to have grown up enough to be more consistently fun to play with, and although we still have the occasional intersibling murder rages, much much more often it’s all cuddles and delight and actively enjoying each other. Quite a nice family I got.
• Big design thing is going well… considering I’m about to rip most of it out once again. But I got 97% there, enough to be very sure of what needs to change and how, so I’m confident I’ll have the pattern written up within a couple of days, and probably it’ll all be reknit by next Monday also. Probably. Maybe. Anyway I’m still really happy with it. This is my year of garments! Well, three garments. Maybe more. I am excite.

#52recipes: none, and I’m officially changing the rules – it was a mistake to think I could do it all from my books. Part of what made it so manageable last year was the number of times I needed to make something specific, and could look up a recipe online. So I’m still prioritising books (and won’t be using Smitten Kitchen’s marvellous weekly mails as meal planning aids), but if I’m not allowed online recipes now and then, I’ll fail for sure.