Growing up reluctantly: 5 things 2.4.18

• Although the kids are by and large delightful these days, M has a fun new phase of throwing major tantrums any time someone does something he even slightly doesn’t like. Usually that’s me, telling him it’s time to go somewhere. One night last week it was C, quite reasonably saying she could go away if he didn’t like her singing, or she could stay and carry on singing, but she didn’t want to stop singing. UN.ACCEPT.ABLE. The thing is, C gets quite concerned when I don’t respond to these huge meltdowns with infinite cuddles and indulgence. She worries that he is obviously hugely upset and I just don’t care at all. It’s very sweet that she wants to make it all better, but she also needs to back off and let me be the mean mommy. And notice how quickly and suddenly he gets over it when (a) distracted or (b) convinced that it really isn’t working.
• I hesitate to say this out loud, for fear of the inevitable mockery next time I disprove this claim (and I mean it is Easter), but I theenk after five years in Switzerland, I might have finally had enough chocolate. Or at least: I might have gotten over my fear of not having enough chocolate? I am a chocolate hoarder and a chocolate binger; I stash it when I see a great offer on my favourites (and there’s always a great offer), and then I munch my way earnestly through it like it’s a job, because only when the chocolate is all eaten up can I get on with virtuously abstaining. Now, I’m not saying I have learned discipline or anything like that, but… I haven’t been moved to stash for a while? and there’s been some chocolate lying around untouched? I mean I’m still eating like a pig generally, but it’s possible that I’m outgrowing this particular trap. Possibly.
• I hate living in a messy place. And yet I also hate cleaning. Combine this with kids and a husband working antisocial hours, and things have been getting a bit out of hand, and depressing me enormously. So, since I haven’t been in any kind of mood for Big Cleaning – but the squalor clearly needs dealing with – I’m trying something old/new. I’m trying to make a point of clearing up just a little bit around me, wherever I am, and especially when I leave a room. Just leave it a little bit better than it was when I got there. Rule for life, and also housekeeping.
• New freelance gig requires far too many phone calls. Which is to say, more than zero. I am not a fan. I mean yay, getting out of my comfort zone, yada yada, building confidence, woot. No thank you.
• I am extremely happy to report that the two-birthdays-plus-Easter month is now behind us, and while all of those things are good things, it’s really nice to look forward to a Quiet Time. It’ll only last a couple of weeks and then we go on holiday, but still. Yes, I realise that I am really very spoilt and ungrateful for looking at upcoming holiday as the fly in the ointment. There’s probably something terribly wrong with me. But really all I want is a nice quiet stretch of nothing.
• Bonus thing, for your viewing (and sharing) pleasure. Srsly, please share widely, it’s A’s first Youtube effort and he’d love it to be seen.

Nos 8, 9 & 10, FINALLY, of #52recipes: About 5 minutes after reporting my tragically cakeless birthday, I decided I did after all want to get baking, and the exact thing I wanted – a dense, fudgy chocolate cake with coffee icing – turned up in my new Nigella book. Hurrah for Nigella! I also made a ridiculously good Bärlauch & smoked salmon pasta thing; my first effort with fresh Bärlauch (um, wild garlic, maybe? A big seasonal THING here and in Germany) and I feel about 5% more Swiss.
I also made a rhubarb strawberry crumble, which is exactly the perfect thing for where we’re at now because it’s seasonal fruit (hurrah spring!) but cooked in a very wintry way (boo totally not spring). Yummers. But not the first time I’ve made it, so no points for me. Still proud of myself for making a bit of an effort in the kitchen though, even if it is just a crumble.
And finally, melting potatoes! Which are indeed amazingly melty. Unfortunately, two-thirds of the way through they were already looking decidedly done, so they didn’t get to wallow in stock – I just hauled them out as-is and cooked some carrots and broccoli in that stock (and in that super-hot oven), which worked beautifully. Next time I’ll cut 5min off the cooking time for each of the three stages, and/or maybe reduce the heat a bit, so I can see what happens to the spuds with that stock.