Thanksgiving isn’t part of any culture I’ve lived in and it’s the wrong week anyway, but I’m feeling very grateful, randomly, for a bunch of stuff in my life. Big things, like my family and where we live. And the awesome schools my kids are going to, and the great partnership we have with their teachers. And small things, like the canteen at work. (It has SO MUCH CHOICE and I can just get a huge plate of healthy deliciousness – including all the things my kids don’t touch so I don’t cook – and I don’t even have to think about where or what I want to eat, I just go take what looks good! No planning involved whatsoever! It is A RELUCTANT HAUSFRAU’S DREAM.)
Also been thinking a lot about the weirdness of going back to formal work after a decade out of it. I did not expect to feel so out of touch. I mean, I’ve been working all along, with actual clients and everything; I’ve been online a lot, I didn’t expect to feel like the way people work had changed significantly. But suddenly… nobody has desk phones any more – you have Skype (which is super powerful when it works, but really screws up your life when it doesn’t). And laptops come with docking stations, so you can extend your screen over to the desktop monitor. And everybody reading this who’s actually been in a job all this time is thinking “well… yuh? That’s not news?” But it is, and when you’re not used to it you kind of need to be shown how it all works, but nobody does that because it’s so old hat. So… stupidity ensues. Anyway.
The upside of having been a decade out of work is that you know the whole job thing is optional. I would never have expected that our family could cope so well on just one salary (it’s not a large salary! Media pays terribly!) and yet, we have. So while I really do want to be working now, when things get stressy, I can always remind myself that if it doesn’t work out… that’s okay too. Not that I’m planning to lose or quit my job, but yeah: things have been stressy, and it’s good to have that certain psychological comfort. Helps to focus on just getting on with things.
Also thankful for a few small but meaningful successes on the design front this week. My new scarf has been doing well – that was expected, but still very welcome – but the thing I pulled together for a subscriber freebie has been far better received than I thought it would. Yay! And, surprise twist, the German version of an old pattern has already paid for itself (translation costs). Now I’m weighing up which patterns should get translated next. It’s pretty hard to determine.
Not so thankful for: the annoying colliding of various circumstances which together meant that, although both kids had Pfadi camp this weekend, all in all I got only about three hours to myself, and no, there was no chance for date night either. C went on Friday evening, M on Saturday afternoon – because for the little ones it was their first time, so, very short and sweet, and also there was Sunday breakfast with the parents. After which, not much time before fetching C from the train station. Meanwhile Armin was out on Friday night and working all weekend, and oh yes, I was babysitting for a friend on Saturday. So it was just constant running around after kids the whole damn time. Never mind, though. This is just the groundwork. One day they’ll both be off camping at the same time, one day… Not that I’m desperate to get rid of the kids or anything, clearly. Ahem. I am an excellent and very engaged mother. Yes.